Compare Yourself To No One

Do you remember the first time someone called you “mom” or you said you were so-in-so’s mom? I do. It was when I brought my brand new baby boy home from the hospital and needed to make his one week check-up appointment at the doctors. “Hello. Yes, this is Seth’s mom. I’m calling to make an appointment for him.”

Although I had zero experience as a mom and very little know how, I was immediately given the title of mom. And though it felt new, it felt wonderful, and I wore it proudly. Motherhood was part of the high calling God put on my life. So why is it then that when I bravely followed God’s calling on my life to write and speak, I didn’t instantly and proudly wear the titles “writer” and “speaker”? If you are pursuing your own God-ordained calling, you will understand what I’m talking about.  Are you a photographer? An artist? A graphic designer?

I am an author and a speaker. Although I’ve been an author for a year now and a speaker for three, I tend to stammer and search for the right words to say when someone asks me what I do. I somehow believe the lie that I must attain large amounts of experience and success before wearing the titles.

I have learned that although a title feels big and uncomfortable when we first try it on, unless we wear it, wiggle around in it and go out in public with it, we will never fully embrace who we are and what we are called to do.

 I understand that wearing the fancy title invites attention like a woman wearing an oversized purple hat with a giant red flower awkwardly pinned to the side. People may even judge you. Insecurity tries to call your bluff and you begin comparing yourself to others who wear the same title. Stop! Comparison accomplishes only two things. One is that you will find someone who wears the title better and you’ll become discouraged. The second is that you will find someone who wears it worse and you’ll be puffed up with pride. Either way, comparison is a killer. Don’t do it.

Remember, dear friend, that the One who called you is faithful to fulfill His will in your life. Say this verse out loud with me, “Even before I was born, God chose me and called me by his marvelous grace. Then it pleased him to reveal his Son to me so that I would proclaim the Good News about Jesus to the Gentiles” (Galatians 1:15-16). Did you catch that? God chose you and called you! In fact, Jesus says in John 15:16, “You didn’t choose me. I chose you. I appointed you to go and produce lasting fruit.” Let the many truths in these verses sink into your bones today.

In John 15, Jesus calls himself the Vine. The nature of a vine is to spread. Jesus graciously chose you and me to be the branches, and we are to bear his fruit. There is only one Vine, but many branches. You may look very similar to another branch on the Vine, but there is still only one you. One beautiful, chosen and crowned you. When we, the branches, learn to intertwine and work together, instead of competing and strangling life from one another through competition and comparison, the Gardener’s garden will grow and produce much fruit.  Satan knows that if he can inject enough poisonous fear, insecurity and pride into the branches that it will render the garden useless and ineffective. The Bible says to humble ourselves before God, resist the devil, and he will flee from us (James 4:7).

Friend, we need to remember Who our success comes from and humble ourselves under his mighty hand. When we stay connected to the Vine and resist the temptations of pride and comparisons, we can soak in Jesus’ love, acceptance, encouragement and power. As we confidently embrace the title of our calling, faithfully using our gifts and talents for the assignments God has given us, then His salvation message and plan for His people will spread to the ends of the earth.

Anna Frye is a speaker, author, television host and founder of the Chosen and Crowned tribe. She invites moms and wives to celebrate imperfect progress fueled by the grace of a perfect God. She helps women bravely talk about the messy places of life, instead of hiding shamefully under them. She believes that lasting beauty comes when women courageously surrender their ashes to God and allow him to do something mind-blowingly amazing with them. If this resonates with you, then you belong with the Chosen and Crowned tribe. Connect at www.ChosenAndCrowned.com/blog