WIFEY WEDNESDAY: My "Little Man" and My "Big Boy"

My son is not a little boy anymore, but he's not a man yet either. He's right in between. At 11-years old, he's almost as tall as I, knows more about technology and math, and can just about beat me at a sprint across the back yard. I affectionately call him "my little man" because that's what he is. Part of him wants to be so grown up, but the other part wants to hang onto boyhood forever.

My husband is not a little boy anymore. He's all man. At 29 (plus 9) years of age, he towers above me, knows way more about math than I ever care to, and can run circles around me in any given race. Most of him is so grown up, but there is a small part that wants to hang on to boyhood forever. 

I could share how he loves his "big boy" tractors, trucks and video games, but the heart of today's post is to talk about how we, as wives, can minister to the "big boy" heart of our husband. This all came to me one night as I was tucking my son into bed. We were going through our nightly routine of me tickling him, attacking his face with kisses and talking to him about his day. I prayed for him and then sat quietly by his side, scratching his back. In those quiet moments, this thought came to me:

I hope my son marries a woman who will treat him well. I hope she is a woman who will laugh with him, talk to him about his day and pray for him.  I hope she won't withhold affection from him, but will love him unconditionally. 

I said a quick prayer for my son's future spouse, but then God whispered to my heart, "Are you that kind of wife to your husband? I created your husband's heart to desire you. He needs you to daily laugh with him, talk with him about his day, and pray for him. Do not withhold affection from him, but love him unconditionally. You are the only one in your husband's life who can minister to these heart needs."

Sometimes the "all man" side of my husband can disguise the soft heart he has beating within him. God created men to be strong and lead their families. But he created their hearts to need the soft touch and gentle ways of a woman. Sometimes the hard ways of my husband make me react in a hard way. How wise and beautiful though is the wife who knows how to respond rather than to react. A gentle answer turns away wrath (Prov. 15:1) and a gentle and quiet spirit is so precious to God (1 Peter 3:4). 

Wifey friend, do not withhold good from your husband when it is in your power to act. God has given you great power to minister to your husband in ways that no one else can. When you can meet these unique heart needs of your husband, your relationship will strengthen and your intimacy will deepen.  If you're tempted to say, "But he doesn't meet my needs!" remember that you are still responsible for your own conduct towards your husband. You both will be held accountable for the way you treat one another. Do your part and pray that God will move your husband to do his. We are each a work in progress! God will greatly bless you for your ministry to your husband.

If today's post touched your heart, please share it on your favorite social media! To find more resources from Anna or to learn more about Chosen and Crowned Ministries, visit ChosenandCrowned.com