Weapon #1: Prayer (this post is a continuation of my two most recent posts and is the 7th post in the marriage series)

“The weapons we fight with are not weapons of this world. On the contrary, they have divine power to demolish strongholds.” 2 Corinthians 10: 3,4

My personality is such that I like to be in control. I want to be in control of myself, my children, my circumstances...and my marriage. The only problem with that, of course, is that my husband does not enjoy being controlled by me (nor does anyone else for that matter!). Go figure! Try as I might, there was no amount of silent treatments, door slamming, and nagging that would make my husband change his ways. I had heard prayer was powerful, so I started to pray, “God, change HIM!” Still, there was no change.

We cannot talk about prayer as a weapon used to demolish strongholds or change situations before we talk about it as our number one means of building a relationship with God. Why? Because God cares most about your relationship with Him. Everything else flows out of that relationship.

It took a number of years for me to learn that my attitude in praying was not honoring God. His Word tells us that Spirit-empowered prayer is what is necessary. That kind of praying is full of love. It seeks a relationship with God first before it seeks what God can do. It seeks blessing on the other person. It seeks God’s will to be accomplished. Spirit-empowered prayer is humble and confesses sinful attitudes, like bitterness. It is full of worship and praise.

Spirit-empowered prayer is laying down all claim of control over a person or situation and surrendering one’s life completely to God. SURRENDER. SURRENDER. SURRENDER.

Surrendering our lives to Christ means, giving up control; choosing God’s way over our own way.   I’ll be the first to admit; it’s hard moving out of the way and releasing all desire to control. It’s difficult to wait and wait...and wait for God’s perfect timing. It’s difficult to face the shortcomings in myself.   I had to face the questions, “Do I really trust God? Do I really believe he is who he says he is and will do what he says he will do? Am I truly seeking a stronger relationship with him?”

It was in that crisis of belief, that I faced a crossroads. Would I hold on and keep trying to do things my way, or would I give my heart completely to God, allowing him the room to show himself loving, faithful, gentle, merciful, patient...and POWERFUL.

Friend, when you choose to surrender your husband, marriage and life to God and trust him, that’s when you will begin to see God. Do you want to experience God? Do you want to be amazed by him? Let’s commit to moving out of his way! If you have unconfessed sin, unforgiveness, bitterness, or disobedience in your life, get rid of it! Hanging on to those things is like hanging a giant “KEEP OUT” sign up to God. God will not work until that sign comes down.

Remember, God is most interested in his relationship with you. While God wants your husband to be your top priority, he is not to come before God.   If you’re concerned about your relationship with your husband or your own happiness, more than you are your relationship with God, you will hit a wall every time. Psalm 37:4-7, says, “Delight yourself in the LORD and he will give you the desires of your heart. Commit your way to the LORD; trust in him and he will do this; He will make your righteousness shine like the dawn, the justice of your cause like the noonday sun. Be still before the LORD and wait patiently for him.”

Delight yourself in the LORD. Prayer keeps your eyes fixed on Jesus, instead of on your circumstances. It keeps you fixated on who he is: LIFE, TRUTH, JOY, PEACE, THE GREAT I AM, HOPE, your ROCK and your REFUGE, your SALVATION, the BREAD OF LIFE, LIVING WATER, and COMFORTER, just to name a few.

He will give you the desires of your heart. As you get to know the heart of God, he will change your desires to match his. Once that happens, God delights to give you the desires of your heart!

Commit your way to the LORD; trust in him . Commit your thoughts, words, and actions to complete obedience to God. Commit to surrendering every desire to control in favor of God’s best. When you are tempted in any way, turn your heart to The One who is your Strength, your Fortress, your Deliverer. Talk out loud to him if your surroundings allow.

And he will do this; He will make your righteousness shine like the dawn, the justice of your cause like the noonday sun.He wants to make you a beautiful light for his kingdom – your heart, your mind, your everything – he wants to make you shine like the dawn. Praise you, God!

Be still before the LORD and wait patiently for him. Rest in his power. Waiting on God means you’re spending a lot of time praying. You’re passionately seeking to know him, his purposes and his ways. Along with praying, you’re also watching the circumstances of your day and asking God to show you his perspective.

When we seek God for who he is first, then we can seek God’s mighty hand to move on our behalf and conquer Satan’s attempts to destroy our marriage. In “The Power of a Praying Wife,” by Stormie Omartian, she writes, “We have been given authority ‘over all the power of the enemy’ (Luke 10:19) and can do great damage to the enemy’s plans when we pray. You have the means to establish a hedge of protection around your marriage because Jesus said, ‘Whatever you bind on earth will be bound in heaven, and whatever you loose on earth will be loosed in heaven’ (Matthew 18:18). You have authority in the name of Jesus to stop evil and permit good. You can submit to God in prayer whatever controls your husband – alcoholism, workaholism, laziness, depression, infirmity, abusiveness, anxiety, fear, or failure – and pray for him to be released from it.”

Sweet friend, Spirit-empowered prayer strengthens your relationship with God and unleashes his blessing on your life, your husband and your marriage! It moves the hand of God! Are you desperate for him? Learn how to pray for your marriage. I recommend, “The Power of a Praying Wife,” by Stormie Omartian. Also, “No Easy Road,” by Dick Eastman, is a great teaching on prayer. God gave us this powerful weapon to demolish strongholds. Let’s learn how to use it! Thank you for continuing on this journey with me! Next week, we’ll learn about weapon #2: God’s Word! See you then!